Gohan Lose's His Wisdom
by Lady Bulma
Summary: Gohan needs to lose a little of that wisdom, don't you think?! He's too smart anyway. But, what does Gohan have to say about that?!


Gohan Loses His Wisdom  
By Lady Bulma (the original)   
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Dragon Ball/Z/GT. Nor do I own one of Jay's quotes.  
  
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This is a tale of courage, adventure, fear, and hope. Hope that I might survive this ultimate pain in order to reach a more beautiful future. My name is Son Gohan and I'm your average teenager! Only, not. I'm definitely not average at all, but that's just between you and me. Its hard being a half Saiya-jin and trying to go to a normal school. You know sometimes I get the feeling that everyone at Orange Star High School is suspicious of me. They just think I'm weird though, and that's for sure. I mean how many kids fly instead of walk to school that you know of? Probably just me of course! That's because I'm special. Only at the moment, I'm dealing with a not so special problem. In fact, this very problem seems to be everyone's problem lately. Some people call it the right of passage between highschool and college. Some right of passage it is. Having to go through immense pain in order to reach a higher education doesn't seem logical to me.   
  
They call it my wisdom teeth. I clutch my cheek and look in the mirror every day to see if they are back there or not. All I see is that my gums are red and hurt a lot. When I run my tongue over them they sting a little bit. You'd think that a Saiya-jin, who gets into a lot of fights, could ignore such pain, but that's not true at all. It hurts like hell! It's just so annoying back there constantly throbbing. I feel like a baby sometimes and start chewing on things just to help them break free of the gums. Its not really working. I feel as if they are stuck there, and will never come out. Average life isn't what it's cracked up to be.  
  
Yes, this is my average teenage adventure. For once, I wish I didn't have to go through this just to be like a normal kid. So, I guess we can start the adventure at the dinner table. That is, after all, the most logical place to begin any story about teeth. That night also just happened to be the one night that Dad is back, so my mom made the greatest meal ever. The greatest meal ever includes, fish that Goten caught (what a fine young fisherman he's turning out to be), potatoes, mashed potatoes that is and lots of them, corn, carrots, and cheesy bread. Nothing is better than cheesy bread. On the side I had a giant glass of ice cold milk just waiting to be devoured. Who could ask for anything more? I could. The ability to eat it without having to go through a ton of pain!   
  
I managed to hide the pain for the most part. I think the fact that I only ate three plates instead of my normal seven gave it away though. Naturally, Mom thought I was sick, but my dad is just silly.   
  
"Wow Son, you really have changed. You hardly eat a thing!" he exclaimed.   
  
"Well, I normally do, but I just don't feel like eating that much."  
  
Mom began to fuss over this. "Oh dear Gohan, don't tell me that you're sick. Are you? Lately you haven't been eating much at all! Is my cooking growing worse with old age just around the corner? Or is it because of a girl?! I bet its that Videl! She's the cause of this. Distracting you like that, how horrid. A boy your age should be eating a full meal. You're probably going through your very last growth spurt. Oh my gosh! If you're growing that means you need new clothes and that means I need to go fabric shopping, and that means I need to pull out the old sewing machine, and that means that I get to make you a whole new wardrob!!!" Hands found their way to her face and she stared off into space with sparkling eyes. "I just love to make new clothes for you boys. Its always so much fun dressing you up. Though, I wish I had a little girl. It would be so nice to dress her up and take her out."   
  
"I could give you another child if you wanted Chichi. It wouldn't be too hard, and I'm sure you would enjoy it," Dad announced in response to his wife's outburst with a little wink. Time in the after world does make a man lonely for his wife. I spit out what little food I had in my mouth.  
  
"Please Dad! NOT at the dinner table I beg of you!" I felt as if I were to faint.   
  
Mom nodded and added, "Although Gohan is old enough to hear talk like that, oh my poor boy has grown, Goten is NOT! How dare you speak like that Goku!" The man could only laugh at his silly little wife. She crossed her arms and exclaimed, "For such behavior, you won't get any dessert!" This almost made Dad collapse. He found himself on the floor, at Mom's feet groveling for forgiveness.  
  
"Oh please Chichi! You know I was only joking! I beg of you Chichi, serve the dessert. I'll do anything. ANYTHING! Just please Chichi give me dessert!" She turned her back to him and, so Dad did the only thing that he knew how to do. He held her close from behind and softly whispered into her ear, "I love you." Naturally, Mom gave in after such a romantic moment from Dad. He had her number.   
  
I rose from the table, "Well I think I'm done for tonight."   
  
Mom stopped melting in Dad's arms and looked at her baby frantically, "But dessert sweety! Dessert! Special dessert! Don't you even want that? I slaved all day to make this cake."   
  
"I'm not really hungry, Mom." My stomach betrayed me growling in protest against my words.   
  
"What's wrong Gohan? Honestly." Mom's eyes were filled with worry.   
  
"Just my mouth is a little sore. I'm fine really." Arms went in every direction. No longer did the mistress of the household need to speak. Instead she just motioned for things to happen, and things did happen. First, I was tied down to a chair. Second, Goten fetched the flashlight. Third, Mom stared down my throat. Now, I had never been to a dentist before in my entire life, so I had no idea what was going on per se. I mean of course I've read about this kind of thing in books, but living a story is quite different, I say!   
  
"Well, I don't see any cavities... Gohan, your back gums are all red. I think its time you had your wisdom teeth pulled. They'll make the rest of your mouth crooked! Oh how horrible! I want my baby to have extremely beautiful teeth. Pearly whites! All nice and straight. I'll take you to an oral surgeon tomorrow. I've been saving money for this kind of emergency." There was an extremely long silence, a bad silence.  
  
"Um...Chichi.... was that the money in that little box on your dresser?" The silence grew only stronger. "Yeah, um...I kind of.... spent that today. But Goten loves his new training weights!" The silence became deafening.   
  
"You did WHAT WITH MY MONEY?!?!?!?!"   
  
"I just wanted to get people a few little gifts. I honestly didn't know that you were saving it for something important."   
  
"You know Goku, there's only so much a woman can take! AND THIS HAS PUSHED THAT! How DARE you come back here and then run this house like you're the man! HOW DARE YOU! I swear to Kami that this is one of the worst things you've done to me in a while. And YOU HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN HERE FOR A WHILE!" Mom broke down crying on the floor. Goten went over to her and held her for a long time.  
  
"We can return the stuff Dad bought me today Mommy."  
  
Between the sobs she whispered, "No, its ok. We'll get by." You know that floating lightbulb when people get ideas? If those really existed, one would have magically appeared for my dad. This only brought fear to my heart. Courage was necessary.   
  
"I got it! Its the best idea I've ever had. I've seen doctors remove teeth thousands of times on TV! I'm sure I could do it too. Goten! Fetch the tool box!" Dad then, after a huge struggle, tied me down to the chair with energy bindings. I broke the chains. Mom was too busy sobbing her eyes out to pay attention to me. Fear was strong in my heart. Much fear. "Why are you struggling so much?! Its not like I'm going to hurt you." My eyes grew wide. I mean they were the size of pizzas. Pizza actually does sound pretty tasty at the moment. I could go with some of that.   
  
"Mom, get Dad AWAY from me! Now! Save me! Save me Mommy!!!!!! MOMMY! SAVE ME!" Mommy wasn't there though. She had left, to go and cry silently in her room, alone. There I was with Dad, Goten, energy bindings, and a box filled with dirty, rusty tools. I clamped my mouth closed real tightly. I didn't want those things in there and I especially didn't want my dad opperating on me.   
  
"Come on Gohan! Be a sport and let me give it a go. It'll make your mom happy." I shook my head back and forth real fast. No way. I had saved a little money! Tips from being Great Saiya-jin Man! I could get it done with that! "Please Gohan.... I promise it won't hurt a bit. Hm... Goten, fetch me ice! We have to num the gum." The little fetch boy ran to the ice box and brought back a single cube. "Excellent son. Excellent job. Now, lets try and get this thing in Gohan's mouth." They pressed it to my lips and pushed, pushed, pushed, pushed until I felt like they were going to break my front teeth. I had to open my mouth. They didn't just put ice in there though. They put two cotton balls in there knowing that would keep me from closing my mouth. I couldn't spit them out either. They were stuck to my tongue disgustingly.   
  
"Daddy! Use the pliers! That's what they always do on TV. I learn so much from TV! Its the greatest source of edumakashin ever!"   
  
"That's the truth son. That's the truth. I don't know why your mother fusses so much when it comes to books when they have books on TV that you can watch. Fetch the pliers!" Goten handed him the largest pair.   
  
"I think we need these. Gohan is REAL strong Daddy. He needs big tools to get big things done." Goten turned the flashlight back on and pointed it inside my mouth. The cotton balls only made my words sound slurred and stupid. "What was that Gohan?! You want more ice!?" Goten stuffed another cube into my mouth. I felt as if I were going to choke. My eyes though would not allow me. They were fixated on the tool of doom.   
  
"Open wide son. I promise this won't hurt a bit." Holy shit no! I shook my head wildly and tried to slide the chair back. I only hit the wall and bumped my head. Goten just laughed like the innocent little thing that he is. I wanted to die on the spot.   
  
"Daddy, um, the pliers are kind of dirty."  
  
"Oh that's true," Dad replied while examining them. "Well we can fix that!" He took his dinner napkin and cleaned them off real quick. "All better!" Goten nodded happily. "Ok, now open wide!" He slowly put the tool into my mouth. I could taste the rust. I clearly was not under any anesthetics. My eyes began to water. "Don't tell me it hurts already?! I haven't even begun pulling." Poor eyes. I think they grew a size that night. He started to pull on my back mollars. He almost ripped them out! Thankfully, I'm a Saiya-jin and he was trying to be gentle with me.  
  
"Dad, I don't think those are his wisdom teeth. I was watching the discovery channel and they said that every adult, and Gohan is almost an adult, has this many teeth." He lifted up some fingers. "And therefore, he doesn't have wisdom teeth." Goku looked at the boy for a while and then withdrew the pliers for a moment.   
  
"Are you saying that you saw this on the Discovery Channel?" Goten nodded all cutely. "Its settled then, you don't have wisdom teeth. Sorry about that Gohan!" He withdrew the energy bindings and laughed for a while stupidly. I ran like a deer to the sink and drank like seven thousand gallons of water after ripping those stupid balls of poison from my mouth. When I was finally able to speak again I glarred at them both with fire in my eyes.  
  
"What is wrong with you?! My wisdom teeth are UNDER the gums!"  
  
"Why didn't you say so? I could have had Goten fetch a knife."   
  
"No knife! No no! Pain killers. Pain killers good. Pain killers friend."   
  
"You're mom has tylenol..."  
  
"No no. Strong pain killers good. Tylenol bad. Pain killers good. Its all good. I'll just go see the oral surgeon tomorrow, get it done real fast. Come home. Be drugged for a few days. Its all good."  
  
"But....I spent the money." Dad looked down ashamed. I felt bad for him the first time that night.  
  
"Dad, Mom has been working. She has basic health insurance that will cover half the price. I have been earning a few tips saving people, so that should cover the rest. I've got about $2000 saved. Its all good." I hugged him. It has been a long time since I've hugged my dad. He looked so pitiful standing there sorrowfully. I just had to hug him. A man who's saved this world more than once should never look like that. I love my dad. Even though he's silly, carefree, and sometimes clueless, I love him. I'm proud that he is my father...even though he almost ripped my molars out. Obviously, the oral surgeon was much kinder towards me when it came to that bit of this adventure, but there's nothing exciting to tell there. I went in, he put me to sleep, and I found myself at home the next day. Amazing, isn't it? I know though, that my dad will always be there at my side to help me through the hardest parts of my life, no matter how average they may be.  
  
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Author's Note: Well, that was my first fic in over ....2 years? wow. A long time. Anyways, please leave a review even though I'm sure this one isn't half as good as my others considering I haven't written in a long time. =^_^= 


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